Cracktasia
by FortunaStoryteller
Summary: Disney songs and the Organization members who parody them. Fun for the whole family! Third, Vexen with a new rendition of "Belle" from Beauty and the Beast, specially tailored to fit with Intelligence and the Mecha Flora Monster!
1. Chapter 1

* * *

Axelfire

Parody of "Hellfire", from The Hunchback of Notre Dame

Parodied lyrics are mine

Original lyrics owned by Disney

* * *

Axel

_O hear me, Kingdom Hearts,_

_You know I'm not a righteous man,_

_I have no virtue of which to be proud..._

_But hear me, Kingdom Hearts,_

_for you know I am no worse than,_

_the others in this wicked, heartless crowd!_

_So tell me, Kingdom Hearts,_

_why I see him standing there, _

_why his smoldering eyes still scorch my soul?_

_I feel him, I see him,_

_Your light caught in his golden hair,_

_is blazing in me out of all control..._

_Like fire, Hellfire!_

_This fire, in my skin..._

_this burning_

_desire_

_is turning me to sin!_

_It's not my fault!_

Latin choir:

_Mea Culpa_

Axel

_I'm not to blame,_

Latin choir:

_Mea Culpa_

Axel

_it is the Key bearer, _

_the boy who set this flame!_

Latin Choir

_Mea maxima Culpa_

Axel

_It's not my fault!_

Latin Choir

_Mea Culpa_

Axel

_And isn't still,_

Latin Choir

_Mea Culpa_

Axel

_if his allure is that much stronger _

_than my will!_

Latin Choir

_Mea maxima culpa!_

Axel

_Protect me, Kingdom Hearts,_

_don't let this child cast his spell,_

_don't let his fire sear my flesh and bone!_

_Destroy Number Thirteen,_

_and let him taste the fires of hell!_

_Or else, let him be mine and mine alone!_

_Hellfire! Dark fire!_

_Now Roxas, it's your turn!_

_Choose me, or, your pyre!_

_Be mine or you will burn!_

Latin Choir:

_Kyrie eleison_

Axel

God have mercy on him...

Latin Choir

_Kyrie eleison_

Axel

God have mercy on me...

Latin Choir

_Kyrie eleison_

_Axel_

_But he will be mine, or,_

_He_

_will _

_burn!_


	2. Chapter 2

Here's number two! Enjoy!

* * *

**Existence**

Parody of "Part of your World" from The Little Mermaid

Original lyrics are Disney's

Parody lyrics are mine

* * *

Demyx:

_Look at this stuff,_

_isn't it neat?_

_Wouldn't you think my_

_collection's complete?_

_Wouldn't you think I'm the boy,_

_the boy who has_

_everything?_

_Look at this room, _

_treasures untold!_

_How many memories _

_can one person hold?_

_Looking around here you think_

"_Sure...he's got everything"_

_I've got gadgets and gizmos aplenty_

_I've got whozits and whatzits galore_

_You want thingamabobs?_

_I got twenty!_

_But who cares, no big deal, I want more..._

_I wanna be where the Somebodies are_

_I wanna see, see 'em all existing!_

_Feeling such joy with those..._

_what do ya call 'em?_

_Oh...hearts!_

_Hiding in Darkness you_

_don't get too far._

_Emotions are there_

_to feel truly happy!_

_Strolling through life without..._

_without missing any..._

_parts!_

_Up where they love,_

_up where they feel,_

_up where they're indisputably real!_

_Wandering free,_

_wish I could be,_

_part of that world..._

_What would I give_

_if I could live out of these shadows?_

_What would I pay_

_to spend a day out in the light?_

_Betcha out there, they understand_

_that they don't, reprimand musicians_

_full of expression_

_sick of suppression_

_ready to stand!_

_And ready to know what the Somebodies know_

_ask 'em my questions and get some answers,_

_what is passion and why does it,_

_what's the word,_

_burn?_

_Whens it my turn?_

_Wouldn't I love_

_love to explore that world up above..._

_out of this place..._

_far into space..._

_Part of that world._


	3. Chapter 3

The short and not-actually-quite-anticipated song from the story, 'Intelligence and the Mecha Flora Monster' has arrived! Though not an actual part of the story, I think it ties in with chapter one to some degree.

I took out a section of townspeople singing about their day to day cares. I hope no one minds.

* * *

Vexen

Parody of "Belle", from Beauty and the Beast

Parodied lyrics are mine

Originals are owned by Disney

* * *

Vexen

_Little town it's a...quiet village. Everyday, like the one before. _

_Little town, full of...little...people..._

_waking up to say..._

Townspeople

_Bonjour!_

_Bonjour!_

_Bonjour!Bonjour! Bonjour!_

Vexen

_There goes the baker with his tray like ALWAY_S.

_The same old bread and rolls to sell!_

_Every morning, just the same,_

_since the morning that we came, _

_to this poor provincial town,_

Baker:

Good morning Vexen!

Vexen:

Good morning monsieur.

Baker:

Where're you off to today?

Vexen:

The bookstore.

I just finished this wonderful book about

non-Newtonian fluids and...

Baker:

That's very nice Vexen.

Marie! The baguettes! Hurry up!

Townspeople:

_Look there he goes that boy's a _

_freak of nature!_

_He's quite an odd one can't you tell?_

_He's not in his proper place,_

_That pale hair and that thin face!_

_It's a pity Ansem didn't teach him well!_

Bonjour!

Good Day!

How is your family?

Bonjour!

Good Day!

How is your wife?

I need, six eggs!

That's too expensive!

Vexen

_There must be more than this provincial life!_

Xaldin

Ah, Vexen.

Vexen

Hello Xaldin, I've come to see the new books.

Xaldin

You've finished the others?

Vexen

I couldn't put them down. Are they in yet?

Xaldin

Just came in yesterday.

Vexen

In that case I think I'll take...this one

Xaldin

Door to Darkness?

You're interested in the Heart now?

Vexen

Why not?

I've heard so much about it;

daring experiments,

magical results,

a genius in disguise!

Xaldin

If you want it all that much, it's yours.

Vexen

But Xaldin!

Xaldin

I insist.

Vexen

Why, thank you.

Thank you very much!

Townspeople

_Look there he goes, that boy is_

_so peculiar!_

_I wonder if he's feeling well?_

_With that gleaming crazy look,_

_and his nose stuck in a book,_

_if he keeps this up we're gonna give him hell!_

Vexen

_Oh...isn't this amazing? _

_It's my favorite part because..._

_you see..._

_Here's...where he tests emotions!_

_But he won't stop ranting on_

_'till chapter twenty-three!_

Town person:

_Now it's no wonder that the _

_whole town hates him._

_He's ugly, hideous to boot!_

Town person:

_Even with a fairer face,_

_he would still be a disgrace!_

_Just a whiny, bookish, snobby little_

Townspeople:

_Whiny bookish snobby little_

_Whiny bookish snobby little _

_coot!_

Demyx:

Wow Luxord, you didn't loose a hand!

You're the best card player in the world!

Luxord:

I know.

Demyx:

Pretty soon, you'll be the richest man in town,

apart from maybe the mayor, that is...

Luxord:

That's why I'm going to get his son's dowry.

Demyx:

Marry Vexen?

But what about...?

Luxord:

You'll be my kept lover,

isn't that good enough for you?

Demyx:

Y-yes, well, o-of course it is, but...

Luxord:

_Right from the moment that I _

_first saw Vexen,_

_I knew he had to be the one!_

_Though he's not much to behold,_

_I still get to keep his gold!_

_So I plan to woo and marry Ansem's son!_

Demyx:

_Look there, he goes, _

_isn't he dreamy?_

_Monsieur Luxord,_

_Oh he's so cute!_

_Be still, my heart,_

_I'm hardly breathing!_

_He's such a tall blond strong and handsome_

_brute!_

**[Insert townspeople singing about their day-to-day cares HERE**

Vexen:

_There must be more than this provincial life!_

Luxord:

_Just watch, I'll make that ugly brat my wife!_

Townspeople

_Look there he goes that boy who_

_thinks he's special!_

_A disappointment to all men..._

_Brains alone won't get him by!_

_So it's little wonder why:_

_We really cannot stand the guy,_

_we hate his guts, we hope he'll die,_

_that science stuff made his brain fry!_

_Vexen!_

Bonjour!

Bonjour!

Bonjour!Bonjour! Bonjour! Bonjour!

Bonjour!


End file.
